crydaisy:

brokendildo:

my friends cat had surgery and now he has no pants


Half cat half uncooked chicken omg

crydaisy:

brokendildo:

my friends cat had surgery and now he has no pants

Half cat half uncooked chicken omg

(via stayoverthere)

"

1. Chocolate is only a temporary fix.

2. A properly-fitting bra is not a luxury. It is a necessity.

3. Your happiness is your happiness and yours alone.

4. How to apply red lipstick.

5. How to wear the crap out of red lipstick.

6. A boyfriend does not validate your existence.

7. Eat the extra slice of pizza.

8. Wear what makes you feel gracefully at ease.

9. Love the world unconditionally.

10. Seek beauty in all things.

11. Buy your friends dinner when you can.

12. Wear sunscreen like it’s your second job.

13. Try with all your might to keep in contact with far-away friends.

14. Make the world feel at ease around you.

15. Walk with your head up.

16. Order a cheeseburger on the first date if you want to.

17. Never, ever bite your nails.

18. Swipe on some lipstick, put on your leather jacket, and sneak into a bar somewhere.

19. Learn from your mistakes that night.

20. Dental hygiene is not multiple choice.

21. Your GPA is not a confession of your character.

22. There is strength in breaking down.

23. You don’t have to like yoga.

24. Pick a tea.

25. Take care of your feet.

26. Pick a perfume.

27. Even if you’re tall, wear the heels anyway.

28. Classy is a relative term.

29. Drink whiskey if you like whiskey.

30. Drink wine if you like wine.

31. Like what you like.

32. Offer no explanation.

33. Advil and Gatorade.

34. You are no less of a woman when you’re in sweats and gym shoes than a woman in stilettos and a pencil skirt.

35. A woman is a woman is a woman.

36. Love your fellow woman with all your heart and soul.

37. Cry, uninhibited, with your friends.

38. Laugh until you can’t breathe with your friends.

39. Tell me everything.

40. Exercise to be strong and healthy. A beautiful soul needs a sturdy vessel.

41. There is no shame in hoping for love.

42. My cooking is the best cooking.

43. Do not take sex lightly.

44. I mean it.

45. Anna Karenina. I’d like it if you read it.

46. The world spins on the principle of inherent tragedy.

47. Do not be blind to it.

48. Men are effectively idiots until the age of 26.

49. Carbohydrates are not the enemy.

50. Involve yourself in an organized activity of your choosing.

51. Listen to classical music occasionally.

52. Take hot baths.

53. Do not use bath salts.

54. You are more than capable.

55. I promise.

56. Don’t smile if you don’t mean it.

57. Mean your anger. Mean your sadness. Mean your pain.

58. I am always, always listening.

59. Travel.

60. Get stuck in a foreign country with $4.67 in your account.

61. Make me furious.

62. Make me worry.

63. Come home smelly, tired, and with a good story.

64. Your story isn’t really yours.

65. You are a compilation of others’ stories.

66. Well-fitting and modest is ALWAYS sexier than too small and tight.

67. Who cares if glitter isn’t tasteful?

68. It’s too much eyeliner if you have to ask.

69. Learn to bake for when you’re sad and I’m not there.

70. Humility and subservience are not synonyms.

71. Wash your face twice per day.

72. Be gentle with your skin.

73. Science is really cool.

74. So is literature.

75. And history.

76. And math.

77. There is no substitute for fresh air.

78. Carry your weight.

79. Make up for it later if you can’t.

80. That salad is not better than pasta and it never will be.

81. You’re fooling no one.

82. Find at least three green vegetables you can tolerate.

83. A smoothie is not a meal.

84. Expect the best from everyone.

85. People will let you down.

86. Bask in the sun (wearing a sunhat and SPF 90).

87. There is a certain kind of man you need to avoid at all costs.

88. You’ll know it when you meet him.

89. What other people say is right doesn’t always feel right.

90. What feels right is where your happiness is.

91. Give thoughtful gifts.

92. Form an opinion.

93. Stick to it.

94. Exfoliation in moderation.

95. Argue with people when you need to.

96. If it’s worth fighting for, fight fiercely.

97. Don’t fight for acceptance.

98. You shouldn’t have to.

99. Take pictures, but not too many.

100. Follow your bliss at all costs. (I’m cutting you off at 22, though).

101. Chocolate ice cream, however, might just be a permanent fix.

"

101 things I will teach my daughters (via herbau)

(Source: unmaiden, via yaa-bisshh)

freshexe:

voguefrance:

spagettinos:

smilebecauseicant:

crotchkat-vantass:

juststrokemyglabella:

2spookysamy:

highonvodka:

themixedbagofspooky:

spoopy-len-in-a-dress:

riningear:

doryishness:

displaced-angel:

ryedragon:

inritum:

reblog and make a wish!this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.
THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.
The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.
AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.
THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.

YOOOOOOO
I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS
LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL
IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

THE BOY I FELL I LOVE WITH LEFT TO TRAVEL THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD AND HAS BEEN GONE NOW FOR 3 MONTHS. WE HAVENT SPOKEN SINCE BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT TO MAKE HIM FEEL TRAPPED TO ME AND NOT ENJOY HIS TIME SO I WAITED FOR HIM TO CONTACT ME FIRST. I SAW THIS ON A PARTICULARLY LOW DAY WHEN I WAS MISSING HIM SO MUCH I CRIED FROM THE PAIN, GUYS I REALLY LOVE HIM, SO I THOUGHT MEH WHAT THE FUCK, AND WISHED HE WOULD JUST LET ME KNOW HE WAS OKAY.
GUYS.
HE FUCKING CALLED ME 20 MINUTES LATER
20 FUCKNG. MINUTES. LATER.
GOOD THINGS DO HAPPEN. AND ITS IN THIS POST.

I wish for someone to leave something in my ask.

OKAY SO I ASKED FOR A HEDGEHOG AND NOW GUESS WHO HAS A PET HEDGEHOG

i really hope my wish comes true

my last two wishes came true, one more couldn’t hurt

SO I WISHED FOR AN IMAC THE LAST TIME I DID THIS AND A WEEK LATER MY MOM SURPRISED ME WITH AN IMAC. HONESTLY SHE DIDNT EVEN KNOW I WANTED ONE, I DIDNT TELL ANYONE, IT WAS AN EARLY XMAS PRESENT. Wow this works

THIS IS FOR REAL IT ACTUALLY WORKS

freshexe:

voguefrance:

spagettinos:

smilebecauseicant:

crotchkat-vantass:

juststrokemyglabella:

2spookysamy:

highonvodka:

themixedbagofspooky:

spoopy-len-in-a-dress:

riningear:

doryishness:

displaced-angel:

ryedragon:

inritum:

reblog and make a wish!


this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.

THIS SHIT WORKS OKAY, I AM DEAD SERIOUS.

The last time I saw this on my dash, I didn’t think it would happen, so jokingly I wished I could go to a fun. concert.

AND GUESS WHAT, I WENT TO A FUCKING FUN. CONCERT.

THIS SHIT WORKS, TRY IT.

YOOOOOOO

I SAW THIS ON MY DASH THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT “ITS WORTH A TRY” SO I WISHED I COULD GET A 3DS

LITERALLY LIKE 4 DAYS LATER MY DAD SENT ME A PICTURE OF THE 3DS XL HE BOUGHT FOR ME WHILE I WAS AT SCHOOL

IM STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

THE BOY I FELL I LOVE WITH LEFT TO TRAVEL THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD AND HAS BEEN GONE NOW FOR 3 MONTHS. WE HAVENT SPOKEN SINCE BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT TO MAKE HIM FEEL TRAPPED TO ME AND NOT ENJOY HIS TIME SO I WAITED FOR HIM TO CONTACT ME FIRST. I SAW THIS ON A PARTICULARLY LOW DAY WHEN I WAS MISSING HIM SO MUCH I CRIED FROM THE PAIN, GUYS I REALLY LOVE HIM, SO I THOUGHT MEH WHAT THE FUCK, AND WISHED HE WOULD JUST LET ME KNOW HE WAS OKAY.

GUYS.

HE FUCKING CALLED ME 20 MINUTES LATER

20 FUCKNG. MINUTES. LATER.

GOOD THINGS DO HAPPEN. AND ITS IN THIS POST.

I wish for someone to leave something in my ask.

OKAY SO I ASKED FOR A HEDGEHOG AND NOW GUESS WHO HAS A PET HEDGEHOG

i really hope my wish comes true

my last two wishes came true, one more couldn’t hurt

SO I WISHED FOR AN IMAC THE LAST TIME I DID THIS AND A WEEK LATER MY MOM SURPRISED ME WITH AN IMAC. HONESTLY SHE DIDNT EVEN KNOW I WANTED ONE, I DIDNT TELL ANYONE, IT WAS AN EARLY XMAS PRESENT. Wow this works

THIS IS FOR REAL IT ACTUALLY WORKS

(via antoloveslimshady)

"

67 Things I Wish I Had Known At 18:

1. Boys will break your heart. Let them. Learn from it.

2. It’s so easy to become jaded, but don’t let it happen to you. Fight it.

3. Stand firm in your beliefs.

4. Love yourself. Sometimes you’re all you have.

5. Cherish the little things.

6. Order pizza at 3am on a Tuesday. It won’t kill you.

7. It’s okay to laugh at yourself. Embrace the imperfections.

8. You are the rule, not the exception. Life will be so much easier if you accept this now.

9. Make mistakes. If you learn from them, they won’t be in vain.

10. He’s lying, there is no fish tank. Go anyway.

11. Classes can be retaken. Life cannot.

12. Sometimes it’s better to ask for forgiveness than for permission.

13. The world is full of cynics – don’t become one.

14. Stop calling him. Stop texting him. If he wanted you, he’d be there.

15. Apologize when you’re wrong. Just suck up your pride and do it.

16. Bellybutton piercings are a bad idea. As are tattoos.

17. No one is perfect. Stop being so hard on yourself.

18. Hug your friends. Cherish them. Hold them tight.

19. Laugh until you cry. Cry until you laugh.

20. Step outside your comfort zone.

21. Order a glass of water with every drink. It’s not lame. It’s smart.

22. A bad hair day really won’t kill you.

23. Dancing on tables should be reserved for special occasions, like birthdays and Thursday nights.

24. Don’t dumb yourself down for a boy.

25. Ignorance is not bliss. Study. Work hard.

26. Life is hard. Accept this and move on.

27. Don’t sweat the small stuff, but do sweat at the gym. Your health is your everything.

28. Tell your parents you love them every chance you get.

29. Stop caring so much about what everyone else thinks.

30. Forgive. Life is too short to be angry.

31. You are destined to be more than just someone’s wife. Act like it.

32. People will hurt you. Don’t stoop to their level.

33. Read a newspaper.

34. Sometimes the only person that you can rely on is yourself.

35. It’s okay if your thighs touch and your tummy isn’t perfectly toned. You’re still beautiful.

36. Don’t let your happiness depend on another person.

37. Push yourself. You’d be amazed at what you’re capable of.

38. Smile through the tears.

39. Don’t slut shame. Girls have it hard enough – don’t turn on one another.

40. It’s okay to ask for help.

41. He’ll never change. Let him go.

42. Trust your instincts.

43. Worrying causes wrinkles and Botox is expensive. Calm down.

44. Take pictures. Lots and lots of pictures.

45. Love with everything you have.

46. Put down your phone and look around. Life is happening.

47. Stand up for yourself.

48. Confidence is everything.

49. Wash your makeup off at night. Seriously. Do it.

50. There are bad people in this world. Don’t be one of them.

51. Be honest with yourself.

52. Be honest with others.

53. You never need that last shot of vodka, but have it anyway.

54. There is a man out there who will not make you cry. Wait for him.

55. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

56. Your success will not be handed to you. Work for it.

57. Don’t waste money on expensive mascaras. Great Lash by Maybelline will always be the best.

58. Give back.

59. He does not define your self-worth. Stop letting him.

60. Life is uncertain. Tomorrow is not guaranteed; don’t take it for granted.

61. Your faith in everything you know will be tested. Push forward.

62. Be carefree, not careless.

63. It’s okay to cry.

64. You will fall, both literally and figuratively. Get back up.

65. Tequila is a bad idea, as is getting back together with an ex.

66. Fad diets never work.

67. Be gracious in all that you do.

"

— Catie Warren
“From Rush To Rehab” (via l0versandliars)

(Source: take-the-backroads, via merenwen-eledhwen-elfprincess)

disclosure-blogger:

Disclosure ‘You help me lose my mind…’

disclosure-blogger:

Disclosure ‘You help me lose my mind…’

(via stayoverthere)

"Let’s get drunk at midnight, listen to our favorite songs and kiss so much that our lips burn"

— (via cosasalvaje)

(Source: heroxn, via dirtyblondeinrehab)

givemeinternet:

My new favorite gif

givemeinternet:

My new favorite gif

(via gutsandgumption)